Michael Bloomberg Concludes Horrible Speech: 'Who Wrote This Shit?'

By David A. Graham

The New York mayor isn't a fan of pun-laden prepared remarks.

Corrected, 5:32 p.m.

You can become mayor of the world's greatest city, and you can become a billionaire, but those accomplishments won't insulate you from having to give insipid, wordplay-heavy speeches on national holidays.

New York Mayor Mike Bloomberg had to leave his Upper East Side digs Wednesday and head out to the far reaches of Brooklyn for Tuesday for the City Hall Park weigh-in prior to the annual Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest. Although the contestants had ample reason for indigestion, it was Bloomberg who seemed most dyspeptic. Not the type to stuff dozens of franks down his gullet, he had prepared remarks to deliver, but he made clear that he wasn't delighted by the preponderance of puns written for him. Suffice it to say, we wouldn't want to be the speechwriter.

One thing that's hard to dislike about Bloomberg is that he's often so plainspoken. It's not unusual that a politician would deliver such an aside; it is unusual that he would make sure everyone could hear him (hot mic mishaps are, of course, a different ballgame). That's also one trait that explains why hizzoner will never be president.

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