This holiday season is not awesome for Idaho Senator Mike Crapo, a Republican member of the "Gang of Eight" and a Mormon bishop, after police caught him driving drunk in Virginia. This is what happens when you slug down too many egg nogs, hop in your car, run a red light in front of a police cruiser at 12:45 a.m. and then fail "several" sobriety tests. Police took the senator into custody, charged him with a DUI and released him on a $1,000 bail. (Note: It's unclear what Crapo was drinking, but since Barack Obama told him to drink egg nog, we're going with egg nog.)
Obviously, Crapo isn't proud of how he spent his Saturday night. "I am deeply sorry for the actions that resulted in this circumstance," he said in a statement, adding that he "made a mistake" and would apologize to his family and constituents. "I accept total responsibility and will deal with whatever penalty comes my way in this matter. I will also undertake measures to ensure that this circumstance is never repeated." Then there's the Mormon thing. We don't want to get too into it, other than to say that drinking alcohol is definitely not cool according to Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Crapo isn't just a member of the church. He's a bishop in the church! But we'll leave that up to God, Crapo and his classmates from BYU.
We have an apology of our own, though. If you happened to be watching Twitter, when this news broke on Saturday night, you were subjected to many bad jokes about the Idaho, and on Twitter's behalf, we're really sorry about that -- especially the ones about Larry Craig. We're sorry about this one:
Crapo is in deep crap-o. #First— David Weiner (@daweiner) December 24, 2012
We're sorry about this one, too:
Crapo is an anagram for o crap.— Hunter Schwarz (@hunterschwarz) December 24, 2012
This one's just lazy:
OH, CRAPO.— GOP Unplugged (@GOPunplugged) December 24, 2012
This one's not too bad:
Republican Senator Crapo arrested for DUI in VA. You can only ask a man how to pronounce his name so many times before he starts drinking.— Shawn Garrett (@ShawnGarrett) December 24, 2012
This one's actually pretty helpful:
AP includes a pronunciation for Crapo's name. twitter.com/ByronTau/statu…— Byron Tau (@ByronTau) December 24, 2012
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.