The Top 10 Things Mitt Romney Might Be Hiding in His Tax Returns

Secrets so shocking that his aversion to transparency would make perfect sense...

mittgrin.banner.reuters.jpg
Reuters

With Mitt Romney's refusal to release his full tax returns, people have naturally started speculating about what he doesn't want revealed. What's so damaging or embarrassing that he prefers to keep it secret even when that means being criticized daily for his lack of transparency?

The question inspired me to put together my totally uneducated guesses about ... the top 10 things Mitt Romney could be hiding:

10) Safety deposit box in the Cayman Islands filled with space between America and Israel.

9) A minority stake in The Apprentice that finally explains the whole keeping Donald Trump around thing.

8) Ann Romney's donation to the "Justice for Seamus" campaign.

7) Fact that his unmarried son is several months into the process of adopting a child with Levi Johnston.

6) The ultimate flip-flop: giving up Mormonism, deriving half his income from perks of being an Operating Thetan.

5) Enough deductions for circuit boards to raise eyebrows.

4) In violation of SEC rules, privately invested in leading Michigan tree-trimming firm same week he was publicly touting how trees are just the right height there.

3) Repeatedly claimed depreciation to his self-respect as a deduction.

2) Six-figure advance from quietly scuttled campaign book Mitt Romney: An Individual Mandate for the Future.

1) Actually gets royalties every time America the Beautiful is performed.

Presented by

Conor Friedersdorf is a staff writer at The Atlantic, where he focuses on politics and national affairs. He lives in Venice, California, and is the founding editor of The Best of Journalism, a newsletter devoted to exceptional nonfiction.

How to Cook Spaghetti Squash (and Why)

Cooking for yourself is one of the surest ways to eat well. Bestselling author Mark Bittman teaches James Hamblin the recipe that everyone is Googling.

Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

How to Cook Spaghetti Squash (and Why)

Cooking for yourself is one of the surest ways to eat well.

Video

Before Tinder, a Tree

Looking for your soulmate? Write a letter to the "Bridegroom's Oak" in Germany.

Video

The Health Benefits of Going Outside

People spend too much time indoors. One solution: ecotherapy.

Video

Where High Tech Meets the 1950s

Why did Green Bank, West Virginia, ban wireless signals? For science.

Video

Yes, Quidditch Is Real

How J.K. Rowling's magical sport spread from Hogwarts to college campuses

Video

Would You Live in a Treehouse?

A treehouse can be an ideal office space, vacation rental, and way of reconnecting with your youth.

More in Politics

Just In