Petitioning the White House for a 'Do-Not-Kill List'

The United States is beginning to enjoy the sort of dark political satire formerly only available in authoritarian regimes.
 


Says the Obama White House of a petition website it created and maintains, "The right to petition your government is guaranteed by the First Amendment .... We the People provides a new way to petition the Obama Administration to take action on a range of important issues facing our country. We created We the People because we want to hear from you. If a petition gets enough support, White House staff will review it, ensure it's sent to the appropriate policy experts, and issue an official response." At the moment, there are 46 active petitions. Here is my favorite:

We petition the Obama Administration to: Create a Do Not Kill List

The New York Times reports that President Obama has created an official "kill list" that he uses to personally order the assassination of American citizens. Considering that the government already has a "Do Not Call" list and a "No Fly" list, we hereby request that the White House create a "Do Not Kill" list in which American citizens can sign up to avoid being put on the president's "kill list" and therefore avoid being executed without indictment, judge, jury, trial or due process of law.

Created Wednesday, it had more than 1,000 signatures within a few hours. If it has legs, it'll be interesting to see how the Obama Administration responds. And although I imagine its intended as biting political satire, if it was actually created, I wonder how many people would sign up in earnest.

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Conor Friedersdorf is a staff writer at The Atlantic, where he focuses on politics and national affairs. He lives in Venice, California, and is the founding editor of The Best of Journalism, a newsletter devoted to exceptional nonfiction.

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