Hillary Clinton Hates My Baby

a guest post from Joshua Green.

The setting: the Green household, Washington, D.C. The scene: late morning, my baby daughter is dosing off after having read “Good Dog, Carl” for the 432 time today. The phone rings. It’s Hillary Clinton--actually, a pre-recorded tape of Hillary Clinton, soliciting our vote.

Baby’s nap abruptly ends.

An hour later, the phone rings. It’s Bill Clinton this time. Same drill, same ruined nap. An hour later: sobbing hysterics have finally yielded to sweet sleep.

The phone rings. The baby wakes up.

It’s Jack Nicholson (!?) calling on behalf of Hillary Clinton.

Don’t listen to the whole tape. Not long after, the phone rings. It’s Hillary again. Baby appears to be suffering from Infant Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Evidently the Clinton campaign is not so short of cash as to have sacrificed a robust calling operation. Interesting, too, that she’s targeting Washington, D.C.

Presented by

Marc Ambinder is an Atlantic contributing editor. He is also a senior contributor at Defense One, a contributing editor at GQ, and a regular contributor at The Week.

The Best 71-Second Animation You'll Watch Today

A rock monster tries to save a village from destruction.

Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

The Best 71-Second Animation You'll Watch Today

A rock monster tries to save a village from destruction.

Video

The Case for Napping at Work

Most Americans don't get enough sleep. More and more employers are trying to help address that.

Video

A Four-Dimensional Tour of Boston

In this groundbreaking video, time moves at multiple speeds within a single frame.

Video

Who Made Pop Music So Repetitive? You Did.

If pop music is too homogenous, that's because listeners want it that way.

Video

Stunning GoPro Footage of a Wildfire

In the field with America’s elite Native American firefighting crew

More in Politics

Just In