Hillary Clinton Hates My Baby

More

a guest post from Joshua Green.

The setting: the Green household, Washington, D.C. The scene: late morning, my baby daughter is dosing off after having read “Good Dog, Carl” for the 432 time today. The phone rings. It’s Hillary Clinton--actually, a pre-recorded tape of Hillary Clinton, soliciting our vote.

Baby’s nap abruptly ends.

An hour later, the phone rings. It’s Bill Clinton this time. Same drill, same ruined nap. An hour later: sobbing hysterics have finally yielded to sweet sleep.

The phone rings. The baby wakes up.

It’s Jack Nicholson (!?) calling on behalf of Hillary Clinton.

Don’t listen to the whole tape. Not long after, the phone rings. It’s Hillary again. Baby appears to be suffering from Infant Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Evidently the Clinton campaign is not so short of cash as to have sacrificed a robust calling operation. Interesting, too, that she’s targeting Washington, D.C.

Jump to comments
Presented by

Marc Ambinder is an Atlantic contributing editor. He is also a senior contributor at Defense One, a contributing editor at GQ, and a regular contributor at The Week.

Get Today's Top Stories in Your Inbox (preview)

CrossFit Versus Yoga: Choose a Side

How a workout becomes a social identity


Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register. blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

CrossFit Versus Yoga: Choose a Side

How a workout becomes a social identity

Video

Is Technology Making Us Better Storytellers?

The minds behind House of Cards and The Moth weigh in.

Video

A Short Film That Skewers Hollywood

A studio executive concocts an animated blockbuster. Who cares about the story?

Video

In Online Dating, Everyone's a Little Bit Racist

The co-founder of OKCupid shares findings from his analysis of millions of users' data.

Video

What Is a Sandwich?

We're overthinking sandwiches, so you don't have to.

Video

Let's Talk About Not Smoking

Why does smoking maintain its allure? James Hamblin seeks the wisdom of a cool person.

Writers

Up
Down

More in Politics

Just In