Hillary Clinton Hates My Baby

a guest post from Joshua Green.

The setting: the Green household, Washington, D.C. The scene: late morning, my baby daughter is dosing off after having read “Good Dog, Carl” for the 432 time today. The phone rings. It’s Hillary Clinton--actually, a pre-recorded tape of Hillary Clinton, soliciting our vote.

Baby’s nap abruptly ends.

An hour later, the phone rings. It’s Bill Clinton this time. Same drill, same ruined nap. An hour later: sobbing hysterics have finally yielded to sweet sleep.

The phone rings. The baby wakes up.

It’s Jack Nicholson (!?) calling on behalf of Hillary Clinton.

Don’t listen to the whole tape. Not long after, the phone rings. It’s Hillary again. Baby appears to be suffering from Infant Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Evidently the Clinton campaign is not so short of cash as to have sacrificed a robust calling operation. Interesting, too, that she’s targeting Washington, D.C.

Presented by

Marc Ambinder is an Atlantic contributing editor. He is also a senior contributor at Defense One, a contributing editor at GQ, and a regular contributor at The Week.

Saving the Bees

Honeybees contribute more than $15 billion to the U.S. economy. A short documentary considers how desperate beekeepers are trying to keep their hives alive.

Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

How to Cook Spaghetti Squash (and Why)

Cooking for yourself is one of the surest ways to eat well.

Video

Before Tinder, a Tree

Looking for your soulmate? Write a letter to the "Bridegroom's Oak" in Germany.

Video

The Health Benefits of Going Outside

People spend too much time indoors. One solution: ecotherapy.

Video

Where High Tech Meets the 1950s

Why did Green Bank, West Virginia, ban wireless signals? For science.

Video

Yes, Quidditch Is Real

How J.K. Rowling's magical sport spread from Hogwarts to college campuses

Video

Would You Live in a Treehouse?

A treehouse can be an ideal office space, vacation rental, and way of reconnecting with your youth.

More in Politics

Just In