Who's Who

A selective index to this month's issue
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Volume 296 no. 3 / October 2005

Adams, Samuel, as Roy Moore muse, 74, 80

Ahmadinejad, Mahmoud, Iranian president, Web site of, 36; as barber in chief, 36; as suspected assassin, 37; historical shyness of, 36-40

Althusser, Louis, as murderer, 103; slapped wrist of, 103

Arendt, Hannah, contested legacy of, 106

Aristotle, on slavery, 114

Austen, Jane, adolescent masterworks of, 119; as teenage historian, 119; little brother of, 126

Bartlet, Jed, take-home pay of, 46

Benson, Mildred Augustine Wirt, Nancy Drew ghostwriter, Hepburnian air of, 118; as xylophonist, 118; as aviator, 118; on jam-and-jelly journalism, 118; De Niro qualities of, 118; ginger surplus of, 118-119

Bonaparte, Napoleon, aborted chunnel of, 121; on elephants, 121; on whales, 121; as Nelson nemesis, 121-126; comeuppance of, 126

Byron, Lord, on melancholy, 55; overnight fame of, 106; maritime aesthetics of, 126

Camus, Albert, on suicide, 56

Chalabi, Ahmed, integrity of, 103

Chambers, Marilyn, porn star, IRS following of, 142

Cheney, Dick, distinctive waistline of, 119

Clay, Henry, liberty and, 111; as slaveholder, 111

Cleaver, Ward, take-home pay of, 46

Coleman, Robert Keith, execution of, 42, 44; possible innocence of, 42, 44

Coleridge, Samuel Taylor, secretarial work of, 124

Colette, mascara of, 119; blue lampshades and, 119; fluffy cats of, 119; collaborationist interlude of, 119

Connolly, Cyril, on success, 122

Crumbley, Nathaniel Mordechai, handyman, suspicious name of, 115

Darwin, Charles, mental illness and, 64

Descartes, René, anti-nature nature of, 94

Diamond, Jared, on Easter Island, 16

Disraeli, Benjamin, mental illness and, 64

Doohan, James Montgomery, as Scotty, 142-143; apocryphal catchphrase of, 142-143; Elvis and, 142; as marital aid, 142; serenity prayer of, 142; missing middle finger of, 143; anti-Shatner sentiments of, 143; as Klingon linguist, 143; prenatal memorial of, 143

Douglas, Michael, as high-maintenance fellow, 116

Douglas, Stephen A., optimism of, 62; pompadour of, 62

Drew, Nancy, hunches of, 115; as Diana, 115; as Athena, 116; marked superiority of to Catherine Zeta-Jones, 116; ginger of, 118, 119; Jordache jeans and, 120; essential conservatism of, 120; as septuagenarian, 120

Dworkin, Andrea, anti-sex arguments of, 129; apt description of intercourse by, 129

Edwards, Matilda, as Lincoln's true love, 56

Elizabeth I, as iconoclast, 112

Ewing, J. R., take-home pay of, 46

Feldstein, Martin, as potential Greenspan successor, 40; as "Dr. Gloom," 40

Fitzgerald, F. Scott, as Baudelaire, 98; as possible plagiarist, 98; Smoky Mountain solace sought by, 98; diseased lungs of, 98; as Pygmalion, 98; as orchid-eater, 98; Isadora Duncan and, 98; as plutophile, 98; withdrawn second chance of, 98

Fitzgerald, Zelda, unmemorialized death of, 97; as dysfunctional muse, 98; intentional tumble of, 98

Fleming, Ian, nineteenth-century Russian influences on, 24

Flintstone, Fred, take-home pay of, 46

Flynn, Errol, as hipster, 132

Forster, E. M., Zadie Smith and, 122

Foster, Richard, namesake dessert of, 138

Frame, Janet, as world-class novelist, 119; as mental patient, 119

Friedman, Thomas, flat arguments of, 48-51

Fukuyama, Francis, as last man, 106; Byronic notoriety of, 106; as Iraq War critic, 106-108; 108; as post-historian, 108; as conflicted Hegelian, 106-108; as figurative Marx, 108

Genovese, Eugene D., as "greatest living historian," 112; on slavery, 112-114; as Marxist, 112; as atheist, 112; judiciousness of, 112-114

Greenspan, Alan, possible successors to, 40

Guevara, Che, as hipster, 132

Heath, Edward, as Chunnel booster, 121

Hemingway, Ernest, epistolary standoffishness of, 131; work schedule of, 132; daiquiri intake of, 131-134; as lackluster drinking companion, 134

Henry, Patrick, liberty and, 111; as slaveholder, 111

Hundertwasser, Friedensreich, painter, many skins of, 127

Huxtable, Cliff, take-home pay of, 46

Jaglom, Henry, as potential knitting auteur, 116

Jeanne, hurricane, as bin Laden peer, 94

Jesus, as mum on slavery, 114

Kahneman, Daniel, Nobel laureate, on economic whimsy, 129

Keitel, Harvey, "brooding pugnacity" of, 74

Kennedy, Anthony, as pro-death penalty, 42; as anti-death penalty, 42

Kissinger, Henry, as Kantian, 108; crashed party of, 108; toadiness of, 108

Lewis, C. S., on slavery, 114

Lincoln, Abraham, public weeping of, 52; suicidal thoughts of, 52-56, 64; as poet, 55-56; buzz-kill autograph of, 58; cocaine and, 58; medicinal sarsaparilla and, 58; high-pitched voice of, 62; urgent eloquence of, 62; Lutheresque integrity of, 62; New York debut of, 62-64; emotional ecology of, 64; as micromanager, 66-68; as theologian, 66-68; as infidel, 66

Madison, James, liberty and, 111; as slaveholder, 111

Martin, Pamela Sue, as Nancy Drew, 119; Playboy poses of, 120

Marx, Groucho, as Trekker, 142

Mew, Charlotte, poet, creosote suicide of, 119; spinsterish virtuosity of, 119

Monroe, James, liberty and, 111; as slaveholder, 111

Moore, Roy, "Ten Commandments Judge," as Rock star, 70-82; ram-horn-blowing supporters of, 70, 81; gubernatorial aspirations of, 74, 81-82; as carpenter, 74; as Keitel ringer, 74; as channeler, 74-75, 80; as PowerPoint theocrat, 75; powdered wig of, 75; broken cisterns and, 75; poetry of, 75; as boxer, 76; as Captain America, 76; as Outback cowboy, 78; as Rove foe, 79, 82; gravitational field of, 81; Nader potential of, 82

Musharraf, Pervez, unsure hand of, 91

Nelson, Horatio, as battlefield entrepreneur, 122; as pelf partisan, 123; as imperialist, 123; as pro-slave trade, 123; sentimentality of, 124; flamboyance of, 124; as Christ figure, 124; as Brontë godfather, 124-126

Neruda, Pablo, as hipster, 132

Nickerson, Ned, Nancy Drew beau, atrophied testicles of, 115

North, Ollie, as blue-light special, 75

O'Connor, Sandra Day, as pro-death penalty, 42; as anti-death penalty, 42

O'Neill, Eugene, on godly glue, 66

Oglethorpe, James Edward, as urban planner, 96; as social planner, 96; anti-slavery intentions of, 96

Paul, apostle, pro-slavery leanings of, 114

Perle, Richard, as Francophile, 102; two-tone shirts of, 102; as scoutmaster, 103; as Democrat, 103

Petrie, Rob, take-home pay of, 46

Picasso, Pablo, subpar drawing skills of, 22

Pickford, Mary, grenadine component of, 132

Pompidou, Georges, as Chunnel skeptic, 121

Prager, Arthur, on tween-specific conservatism, 120

Presley, Elvis, as Trekker, 142

Ribalaigua Vert, Constantino, as daiquiri perfector, 133

Ricardo, Ricky, take-home pay of, 46

Rimbaud, Arthur, Richard Perle and, 102

Robles, Ishmael, kick-boxer, as Roy Moore sensei, 78

Roddenberry, Gene, grandiosity of, 142

Sandoz, Mari, as Crazy Horse biographer, 114; sensitive ethnology of, 114

Santayana, George, on loss, 114

Scoggins, Chris, as Rock roadie, 75-76, 79-80; nocturnal movements of, 79-80

Simpson, Homer, take-home pay of, 46; neologistic stupidity of, 140

Smith, Adam, as naval strategist, 122; as anti-imperialist, 123

Smith, Zadie, sophomore slump of, 122; sitcommy tics of, 122; many strengths of, 122

Sontag, Susan, on Horatio Nelson, 123

Stewart, Martha, as Nancy Drew sidekick, 120

Stratemeyer, Edward, mystery mogul, as Carolyn Keene, 116; Greenspanian virtuosity of, 116; Hardy Boys and, 116; as crack dealer, 118; onomatopoeic editing style of, 118

Strauss, Leo, contested legacy of, 106, 108

Styron, William, on meteorology of depression, 56

Taylor, John, economist, as potential Greenspan successor, 40; as Duran Duran bassist, 40

Traficant, James, as beamer-up, 142

Wallace, George, Roy Moore and, 74, 78, 80-82; "cherished dragons" of, 81

Waring, Fred, as bandleader, 133; as blender backer, 133

Washington, George, liberty and, 111; as slaveholder, 111

Wohlstetter, Albert, as Perle mentor, 102-103; as Chalabi mentor, 103; as mathematician, 102, 106

Woolf, Virginia, sensitive male fans of, 119

Woon, Basil, as cocktail anthropologist, 133

Wordsworth, William, as relative warmonger, 126

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Benjamin Healy is an Atlantic Monthly deputy managing editor.

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