Some Suggestions for New Assad E-Mail Passwords

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Bashar al-Assad's office e-mail accounts were hacked by the Anonymous collective the other day, in part because... well, it's hard to believe:

While Anonymous is infamous for its hacking know-how, it doesn't take a genius computer programmer to guess one of the passwords commonly used by Assad's office accounts: 12345. The string of consecutive numbers is the second-weakest password according to a 2011 study.

As a public service to the Ba'ath regime in its dying days, I thought I would suggest a few alternative e-mail passwords he could use:

1. MyWifeIsSoHot
2. MyWifeIsSmokingHot
3. QueenRaniaIsSoHot
4. SergeiLavrovIsSoHot
5. Rosebud
6. ArabSpringGotoHellAsstards
7. KissMyAssSusanRice
8. IWasGoingtoExpelYouAnywayHamas
9. JewsSuck36
10. IWantDaddyNow

Update: Max Fisher has contributed numbers 11-13, in honor of that wonderful and incisive Vogue profile of the Assads:

11. WildlyDemocracticPrinciples
12. JoanJulietBuckIsSoHot
13. Vogue4Lyfe 

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Jeffrey Goldberg is a national correspondent for The Atlantic and a recipient of the National Magazine Award for Reporting. Author of the book Prisoners: A Story of Friendship and Terror, Goldberg also writes the magazine's advice column. More

Before joining The Atlantic in 2007, Goldberg was a Middle East correspondent, and the Washington correspondent, for The New Yorker. Previously, he served as a correspondent for The New York Times Magazine and New York magazine. He has also written for the Jewish Daily Forward, and was a columnist for The Jerusalem Post.

His book Prisoners was hailed as one of the best books of 2006 by the Los Angeles Times, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Slate, The Progressive, Washingtonian magazine, and Playboy. Goldberg rthe recipient of the 2003 National Magazine Award for Reporting for his coverage of Islamic terrorism. He is also the winner of the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists prize for best international investigative journalist; the Overseas Press Club award for best human-rights reporting; and the Abraham Cahan Prize in Journalism. He is also the recipient of 2005's Anti-Defamation League Daniel Pearl Prize.

In 2001, Goldberg was appointed the Syrkin Fellow in Letters of the Jerusalem Foundation, and in 2002 he became a public-policy scholar at the Woodrow Wilson International Center for Scholars in Washington, D.C.

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