Because I cover health, sometimes people ask me if I'm especially healthy. The answer is no, of course. I'm just better at deluding myself than most people are.

For example, I know that Chipotle burritos are extremely caloric, but I've managed to convince myself that the burrito bowl—all the cheese, guac, and juicy beef, but without the tortilla wrapping—is practically a health food.

No need to work out today, I walked up the Metro escalator! And sure, eight drinks a week is technically "heavy drinking" for women, but I'm Russian.

Unfortunately, the other day I learned about the app Calorific. It's basically a giant truth bomb that pours its radioactive reality down on all the food lies we tell ourselves. With simple, pastel images, the app tells you how much of virtually any food item adds up to 200 calories.

I'll get the two most heartbreaking ones out of the way first:

It is less than one donut.

Calorific

It is half an avocado.

Calorific

Yes.

Here are a few others, if you dare look:

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On the plus side, you can have basically all the lettuce you could ever want:

Calorific

It's British, so some of the food may not be as recognizable or available for us Yanks. (Two hundred calories equals two crumpets, for example.) The app is free, but "unlocking" all the food photos costs $2.99. If you do, indeed, want to do that to yourself.

Anyway, enjoy your brunch!

Calorific