Joel (Jason Bateman), who owns a bottling plant, is denied his marital expectations by his wife, Suzie (Kristen Wiig). She pulls the drawstring on her sweatpants every evening at 8:00 p.m. If Joel is a minute late arriving home there is no party. Joel discusses his dilemma with a bartender friend, Dean (Ben Affleck), (totally unrecognizable in his scruffy beard), and tells him that he has relied on masturbation for months. Believe me, this is ugly stuff and a turnoff.
A beautiful grifter, Cindy (Mila Kunis), who is willing to con or steal from anyone, appears on the scene. An accident occurs at the factory involving Step (Clifton Collins Jr.) who loses one testicle with the other barely hanging on. At Cindy's urging, Step threatens a million dollar lawsuit. This, of course, would not be possible in most if not all states, because of Workmen's Compensation laws that limit recoveries so as to prevent such injuries from overwhelming a business. But facts are not important in this intended but failed erotic comedy.
Aside from his business problems, Joel embarks on a plot suggested by Dean to hire a gigolo, Brad (Dustin Milligan), to seduce Suzie. Brad, one of the dumbest gigolos you will ever meet, is very successful in his advances, having 15, count them, days of coital triumph.
This is one terrible movie that succeeded in making sex unappetizing. I won't tell you how it ends. If you decide to see it, you deserve to suffer.
Photo Credit: Flickr User Bobby Prom
This article available online at:
http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2009/09/weekend-at-the-movies-disappoints/24679/
