'Don't Call Me Babe': Movies' Least-Convincing Action Heroes

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Tyler Perry, Jay Leno, and other entertainers who just can't pull off machine guns and explosions

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I don't know about you, but the first time I laid eyes on Tyler Perry, decked out in his full Madea drag, my first thought was, Yeah, ha ha, fine, but why isn't that guy in a cop movie? Well, at last, that moment has arrived. This weekend, theaters nationwide will welcome Alex Cross, a reboot of the James Patterson adaptations, with Mr. Perry taking over for Morgan Freeman. The idea of that actor match-up is sketchy enough, but with director Rob Cohen (the esteemed filmmaker behind xXx, Stealth, and the original Fast and the Furious) at the helm, Patterson's brainy sleuth has been reimagined as a shotgun-wielding badass. Well, sorry, but I'm not buying it. Below, a closer look at Mr. Perry and a few other folks who are hard to believe as action heroes.

This post also appears on Flavorpill, an Atlantic partner site.

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Jason Bailey is the film editor at Flavorwire, and has also written for Slate, Salon, and the Village Voice.

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