Well, Patrick. I stand for purity, truth, and all the wholesome Red State virtues. Which, in this case, includes socialism. That is, parity. Superteams kind of ruin it, don't they? In Kansas City, the NFL's billionaire version of "You didn't build that" means the Chiefs can compete on a financially level field. MLB, though, has superteams and also-rans—like the Royals. To me anyway, with a view from below, it makes the league loads less fun to watch.

But if it's villains you want, stay away from L.A. This is California, guys. It's Southern California, too. That's the very worst kind. L.A. is the city of TMZ, botox, and Kardashians. It's a place that had no use for F. Scott Fitzgerald or William Faulkner, but made Ryan Seacrest a gazillionaire.

Sure, Boston fans may act all snobby and entitled. Philly fans are loud and crude. The Easterners have passion for their teams and show it. That's good. What are Dodger fans famous for? Coming late and leaving early to beat traffic, mostly.

That's why Jake will still have to sell me on the idea that L.A. is the rising center of American sport. No passion. They are all too... mellow.

Maybe if UCLA gets back to the Final Four and the Trojans win a BCS title. Also if Donald Sterling would get abducted by aliens. Plus, if our country's second biggest city and world's entertainment capital could manage to keep an NFL franchise in town, that would help make the case. Still, in a city that can win a Stanley Cup and yawn, and where cameras at Lakers' games cut away to show Mario Lopez in the stands, it's safe to say that sports is still second-best.

–Hampton

–Hampton