10 Sex Ed Lessons From 'The Office'

theoffice4_post.jpg

NBC


Michael Scott has herpes (in the form of a cold sore) so he goes on a quest to contact all of his past lovers to let them know they may have H-I-R-P-E-E-S. He also does some relationship post-mortems and we get a walk down memory lane with Holly, Jan, and the rest of his many women (and...man). The rest of the office gets an Andy Bernard-led sex ed session.

The takeaways:



1. "The number one sexually transmitted disease is ignorance."
Or so says Andy, who tries to teach the staff about sex under the guise of promoting tolerance for the more promiscuous supplier relations representatives (err...Meredith), but really just wants to find out more about the sexual habits of Erin and Gabe.

2. If you have a baby via sperm-donor, life will be great.
Jan has a new high-powered job, an album of Doris Day covers on her own label, and a really cute kid who goes by the name "Assie." Men are irrelevant.

3. Sex feels unbelievable. And amazing.
And Kevin seems to have a lot of it.

4. Unplanned pregnancy is not actually a negative consequence of sex.
You might get a shotgun wedding at Niagara Falls!

5. The safest way to go skiing is not to ski.
And same with sex. Abstinence is best, although there doesn't seem to be a soul in Scranton who practices it.

6. Women have genitalia too.
And not just Lady Gaga.

7. A pencil is not a good stand-in for a penis when demonstrating condom use.
Find a banana, Andy.

8. Perceptions are personal.
Your "quirky indie movie" fling might be someone else's legitimate relationship. And the person you consider "the one" might think of you as some weird dude she once dated for a few weeks.

9. It's all about heart. Character. Be your best self.
Always go to Daryl for advice. You will always get the same advice. But it will be good.

10. Don't let anyone else delegitimize your emotions.
If you think you found the love of your life and it doesn't work out, it's okay to mourn. Be sad. And who cares if they don't feel the same way? Own the way you feel. Michael gets it and for once, seems pretty healthy. Andy, on the other hand, threw a pizza at the conference room wall. Might it be time for some more anger management training?

The Michael Meter (scale of 1-10, Michael's importance in this episode): 9.8

Best Joke You're Most Likely to Forget: The look of disgust on Angela's face when Phyllis talks about sex being a physical expression of love. She's like a petulant sixth grader.

Prediction of the Week For Who Will be Scranton's Next Regional Manager: Daryl. He gives great advice and is an excellent mediator (see how he suggested that unplanned pregnancy be moved to the "positive consequences" column.)

Presented by

Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register with Disqus.

Please note that The Atlantic's account system is separate from our commenting system. To log in or register with The Atlantic, use the Sign In button at the top of every page.

blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

Confessions of Moms Around the World

A global look at the hardest and best job ever

Video

A Stop-Motion Tour of New York City

A filmmaker animated hundreds of still photographs to create this Big Apple flip book

Video

The Absurd Psychology of Restaurant Menus

Would people eat healthier if celery was called "cool celery?"

Video

This Japanese Inn Has Been Open for 1,300 Years

It's one of the oldest family businesses in the world.

More in Entertainment

Just In