'Scrappers' and the Reality of Being a Junkyard Hound

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Spike TV


Spike TV, the channel for guys who like a high percentage of the things they see to be on fire, premiered Scrappers last night. The series looks at the recently booming scrap metal industry. For me, it's the first reality show with a basis in my reality. I've never danced with the stars or been a bounty hunter, but, well, I kind of love scrapping.

And Scrappers captures what I love about it: The nicked-knuckle frustration and constantly questioning if the job is worth it ("@#!$ getting hurt all day, for a 12-dollar refrigerator?"), the rush when it turns out to be, the people you meet. Oh God, the people you meet.

The show suffers a bit from reality television's easy out: drama derived from characters' buffoonery and interpersonal bickering rather than from actual events—always easier to film an argument, which is essentially talk, than to wait it out and capture something happening. So we get a whole segment of fighting over Darren's mistake of a door not being able to close. But we do get a sense of the hunt. And if anyone who's ever swung a hammer is wondering why these guys are using vans and not flatbed trucks, it's because the reality is that scrapping's largely a jerry-rigged industry. And a lot of the pros who do it are boneheaded amateurs like myself.

I recently held a temporary labor job cleaning out a lab. Part of that involved discarding lab equipment from the 1970s built with so much metal that, had it all been a car, it would have elicited comments like, "Wow. They don't make them like this anymore." They told me to load the pieces into the trash. I thought back to my summer job as an apprentice plumber when I would toss old fittings and pipe scraps into a bucket and cash them in at a scrap yard. So I hauled the pieces down to the loading dock for trash, but put a few choice metal pieces in my car nearby.

Then I took them to a scrap yard near my house. Only a small amount was brass or aluminum. "This is iron," a man in suspenders told me about much of my haul. "I need nonferrous metal if you want real money. Anything that a magnet doesn't stick to, I can take."

"Go to Chelsea," a man who didn't work there but who just seemed to be hanging out said. He turned his head to make sure no one heard him. "The prices are always higher in Chelsea."

I left with $11.86 and some advice from a guy who hangs around scrap yards in his free time. I also started carrying a magnet. Now, at work, I was focusing on things it didn't stick to, prying them out of the pieces I was throwing out.

For the next trip to the junkyard, one in Everett—closer than Chelsea—I asked my roommate Peter to come along. "Show me your scrap metal face," I said as we headed out. Peter dropped his smile and suddenly looked both frustrated and suspicious, like he was waiting in a long line to pay a parking ticket he didn't feel he deserved. "Perfect," I said. Then I handed him a tape measure to wear so we'd look like we knew something about brass or life.

Scrap yards are typically located in rusty, Brooklyn-looking sections of cities, the types of places where bands in skinny jeans pose for their album cover photos looking all wan and pensive; places photography students "discover" and decide to shoot for their final class projects, only to discover that everyone else in class chose the same location. We pulled in, past a crane tossing fridges and junk iron, driving on a path of flattened, dirty metal. I parked next to a line of red bins and told Peter to watch out for the fishhook sticking up off the ground. They had to cut open my aluminum tubes. No offense taken. I didn't know what was in them either. It turned out to be just a little water, so 40 cents a pound. Little brass, some junk iron. We made 69 dollars and ate burritos to celebrate.

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Steve Macone is a humor writer based in Boston. His work has appeared in the Boston Globe, the Christian Science Monitor, and many other publications. More

Steve Macone is a humor writer based in Boston. His work has appeared in the Boston Globe, the Christian Science Monitor, and many other publications.

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