From The Annals Of Airline Security

Not the Onion:

Rivers wasn’t allowed on her Newark-bound flight in Costa Rica this past weekend by a “jittery Continental Airlines gate agent” who thought the two names on her passport, which reads “Joan Rosenberg AKA Joan Rivers,” seemed “fishy.”

But a dude who paid cash for a one-way ticket, checked no bags, and whose father had begged the CIA to keep an eye on him ... well the system worked, didn't it? And no one - no one - will be fired.