Attacking Petite Vanilla Scones

By Patrick Appel
Jaime Sneider does Very Important research into the campaigns' coffee expenditures: 

Before its June report was filed, the Obama campaign had spent about $1,800 at Starbucks and $1,400 at Dunkin Donuts. The McCain campaign, on the other hand, has spent a mere $498 at Starbucks and $970 at Dunkin' Donuts. It is also well known the Straight Talk Express is stocked with Dunkin' Donuts coffee.

If coffee is a heuristic for the presidential election, the McCain campaign is in good shape. While Starbucks is in the process of closing 600 locations, Dunkin' Donuts is opening dozens. Because Americans are pessimistic about the economy, they're more likely to spend only a buck or two on a cup of coffee than they are to splurge on the mocha chip frappuccino. There is also some dignity in being able to say small, medium, or large as opposed to tall, grande, or venti. Customer surveys also show that Dunkin' Donuts is out pacing Starbucks for the first time in years.

Ooookaaay.