Words to live by

More

Tom Lee offers a simple solution for those who find themselves unctuously informing the rest of us that they do not own a television:

If you don't own a TV, go buy one. This way you'll never be tempted to unnecessarily mention

If you don't own a TV and are able to refrain from relating this fact, then, uh, carry on.

TO CLARIFY: You don't have to watch it, of course. That's your call. But by owning a television, most attempts to proudly explain your aversion to the medium will become so bogged down in qualifiers that they'll never escape your lips. This will be well worth the $19 investment.

ALSO: Obligatory Onion reference.

that you don't own a television, preventing everyone else from thinking you're a supercilious jackass.


Remember, these days, when you say "I don't own a television", you're not just misleading people into believing that you spend all of your spare time reading Proust in the original Sanskrit; you're also signalling that you don't have a Wii.  This is a major social liability.

Jump to comments
Presented by

Megan McArdle is a columnist at Bloomberg View and a former senior editor at The Atlantic. Her new book is The Up Side of Down.

Get Today's Top Stories in Your Inbox (preview)

Tracing Sriracha's Origin to a Seaside Town in Thailand

Ever wonder how the wildly popular hot sauce got its name? It all started in Si Racha.


Elsewhere on the web

Join the Discussion

After you comment, click Post. If you’re not already logged in you will be asked to log in or register. blog comments powered by Disqus

Video

Where the Wild Things Go

A government facility outside of Denver houses more than a million products of the illegal wildlife trade, from tigers and bears to bald eagles.

Video

Adults Need Playtime Too

When was the last time you played your favorite childhood game?

Video

Is Wine Healthy?

James Hamblin prepares to impress his date with knowledge about the health benefits of wine.

Video

The World's Largest Balloon Festival

Nine days, more than 700 balloons, and a whole lot of hot air

Writers

Up
Down

More in Business

Just In